Press or Relax pt. 2
I haven't seen my own hair since the end of October. I have had a sew-in weave, braided extensions, and this past weekend I had to face the reality of -- my own hair. I had been dreading this moment for the last four months. My weave gave me the illusion that my hair was fabulously long and easy to maintain. As soon as the weave had run its course, I ran to the braid shop so that I wouldn't have to go through hair withdrawals or face the tragedy that rested on my scalp. I don't believe in "good" hair or "bad" hair, however, I do know that the hair God chose for me must have been a character building exercise. Sometimes I wish my mother would've met my father's sisters so she could've seen what my hair odds would've been if she married him. On my way to the salon, post-braids, I couldn't even put my hair in any somewhat presentable style. I simply put on a scarf and anxiously waited for the moment my stylist would be ready for me. As I sat on the couch in the waiting area near the window, I took off my scarf and my stylist walked over to see "how bad it was". A Jewish man walked by and took a double-take glance like he couldn't believe what the hell it was he saw. The woman sitting in the chair was getting a relaxer and I was tempted by familiarity. I knew that little cup of AFFIRM would solve all my problems. I got mad at myself because I couldn't remember why I wasn't relaxing my hair in the first place. I want to be free from hair woes. White women are free to have natural hair (non-chemically treated) and I want to be equally free. With black women, our hair is a link to our hearts. Walking out of the shop, with a hair cut and style that I absolutely hated, I longed for a relaxer. In fact, I really want one right now. Waiting for the glory of healthy hair and going through the rough phase is the hard part. I guess I have become subject to instant results...is it worth the wait?
4 Comments:
It will be worth it when you are not spending $60 plus tip every two months for a relaxer...
..when you have that NATURALLY soft hair..
..when you get to answer "nope this is natural!"
This must be a very interesting experience. I would love to see what it looks like right now.
well, some of us black women dont have that problem..(pushing my hair over my shoulder, and tossing it back)...LOL
Dont you think its time to be free of the expectations of natural or relaxed. I mean shouldnt u wear you hair how you see fit...hair is nothing but an accumulation of dead cells dont take it so serious...whether its natural or chemically treated its still your hair should u be perscuted for wearing make up or following your logic clothes...either way none of this external crap detracts from the authentic you...get past it...
I agree with some things that were said. I definitely have been in a battle with my hair. But I 'kissed the relaxer goodbye' in Fall 2004 and haven't turned back since. Not only is my hair healthier but when I press it out my two years worth of non-processed hair, it is longer than the shoulder length relaxed hair that I spent my ENTIRE life growing.
I'm not going to front like I don't have my days when I want a relaxer for the convenience or style but I think it's important for every woman (during the years after she turns 18) to deal with her hair in its natural state. I don't know all of your reasons for not getting a relaxer but just to see that while we remember our naps being a hassle in our childhood, our hair can be very manageable with kinks and all is needed...plus its SO much stronger and versatile.
With that said I want to paraphrase someone and say "the revolution isn't on your head; it's in it" and let you hear india.arie's song "I am not my hair". It's great! Anyway, keep ya head up! Whatever you do; you'll be fuhLY(fly).
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